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Are you struggling to set boundaries in your relationships and worry that you might be a codependent person? It can be hard to identify the signs of an unhealthy relationship when you’re in the thick of it, but this codependency test can help you spot the warning signs early on before they become a major problem.
Codependency isn’t a mental illness, but it does have a significant impact on your ability to lead a very satisfying life. If you find that you have a difficult time putting boundaries in place and sticking to them, this 25-question codependency test and worksheet will help you zero in on what you need to do to course-correct.
Catalina Behavioral Health can help you with codependency and relationship addiction in a therapeutic setting with support groups, individual therapy, and family therapy. Keep reading to learn whether you could benefit from professional help for your unhealthy relationships and boundaries.
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Quiz for a Codependent Relationship or a Relationship Addiction
Are you unsure whether you put the feelings and experiences of others ahead of your own needs? It can be a real challenge to spot a codependent relationship and even harder to overcome codependency and low self-esteem. This short quiz will help you to identify situations in your life where codependent tendencies might affect you.
For each question, answer with a true or false statement. Keep track of your answers so that you can score them in the next section.
- I prefer to avoid conflict and not express feelings when I think it might lead to conflict in an important relationship.
- I feel like I spend a lot of time on things that don’t matter and don’t move the needle forward on my desires for life. I never get anywhere with my efforts.
- I don’t take good care of myself because I’m too busy being a caretaker for others.
- I would be embarrassed if people knew certain things about my life, my emotions, and the things that bring me joy.
- After I have an interaction with a loved one, I spend an inordinate amount of time criticizing and critiquing how our conversation played out.
- I didn’t grow up in a home where we talked about our feelings openly.
- I don’t feel like my love life is satisfying and it tends to lack intimacy with my partner(s).
- I often have a hard time defining my emotions and seeking professional help when needed to process them within healthy boundaries.
- I have the desire to do more and accomplish more than I’m currently able to do.
- Often, I feel like no one is available to help me with the things that are on my to-do list.
- I prefer not to do activities on my own.
- Even when I’m upset or angry, I try to put on a positive face so that others don’t recognize those feelings in me.
- I don’t feel like I have a good idea of where I’m headed in life and wish I could change direction.
- I feel trapped in confusing relationships.
- I don’t express my feelings to prevent upsetting my family members or friends.
- Even though I don’t have the time or energy, I often say yes when close family members or friends ask for my help on a project.
- When someone hurts my feelings with a careless remark, I find it difficult to confront them with my feelings.
- I struggle to know when I should speak up for myself and often go along with the plans other people have set in place for me.
- I don’t like to let new people into my life or let them experience who I am. As a result, I feel like very few people know the real me.
- I hate being alone and would prefer the company of others.
- I prioritize others over myself.
- I constantly feel the need to apologize for my feelings, actions, and words even if there is no evidence that I have done something wrong in my relationships.
- I find that I do too much for the people in my life and I look back on it, wondering why I felt so inclined to put so much effort into the relationship when it wasn’t reciprocated.
- If I were to let go of my role in my relationships, I think that everything I built would fall apart.
- I often do more than I think I should to sustain the status quo in my relationships.
Scoring Your Codependency Test
With your answers in hand, it’s time to see whether your mental health could benefit from professional intervention for your codependent behavior. Tally up how many “true” answers you had in this quiz and see which category you fall into to assess if you need emotional support to course-correct.
1-5 True Answers
If you had five or fewer true answers, you likely don’t struggle with codependent relationships. Odds are good that you grew up in a healthy family who expressed their feelings openly and taught you how to do the same. You carry these lessons into adulthood and might have very few mental health issues or behavioral health issues that result from an unhealthy childhood.
6-14 True Answers
When you have a significant number of true answers on your test, it might be a sign that you need to start prioritizing your own needs. People with scores in this range are very likely to have grown up in dysfunctional families and those beliefs may transfer into adulthood. It would be good to get help for this issue now so that you can start to set boundaries with loved ones.
15-20 True Answers
This represents a very serious issue with codependency. Chances are that you feel guilty about your relationships when you attempt to set boundaries. You may not have a real clear idea of what healthy relationships look like. You will need professional help to counteract the negative consequences of these sustained codependent patterns.
21-25 True Answers
If you answered almost every question on the quiz as a true statement, then you should get help for your codependency. You may experience other addictive behaviors that influence your relationships because you have a hard time coping with unsustainable relationships. You need to cope with your family history and take charge of your own life.
Commonly Asked Questions about Codependency
Many people have questions about codependency that keep them from seeking the professional help they need to have healthier and more satisfying relationships with loved ones. Here are the answers to the questions you might be asking right now.
Is Codependency a Mental Illness?
No, codependency or relationship addiction isn’t a mental illness. Instead, it falls into the category of a behavioral condition. It leads you to inordinately prioritize the feelings of others above your needs and desires. It speaks more to the quality of your relationships which tend to be fairly one-sided.
However, codependent people do tend to be more depressed which may be what prompts them to seek treatment initially.
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What is the Link with an Alcohol or Drug Addiction?
There is strong evidence in the literature that those who have partners with a substance use issue are more likely to be codependent. You might go out of your way to placate them in hopes that they won’t turn to drug or alcohol abuse to cope. In the end, you will enable their behavior for the long term.
This means that both partners may need to seek help when substance abuse is in the picture. Therapy will help you to maintain boundaries and secure your emotional well-being so that you no longer have to feel responsible for a partner’s drug and alcohol use.
How Do You Treat Codependency?
Codependent individuals will want to seek professional help for setting boundaries. It goes beyond mere self-care and will require intensive work with an experienced clinician. Talk therapy and family therapy where you can start to reshape the relationship is a great first step. Some may prefer the 12-step models and support groups designed to offer help for this issue.
Get Help for Codependency at Catalina Behavioral Health
If you find that you’re struggling with any of your close relationships, it might be time to think about getting help for codependency. You don’t have to feel guilty for practicing self-care when it comes to setting boundaries with a friend, partner, or family member.
Codependency issues can be treated with intensive help in Catalina’s inpatient program or on an outpatient basis. Our enrollment team can answer your questions about treatment and help you take the first steps toward healthier relationships today.